"Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next. Delicious Ambiguity." ~ Gilda Radner

Sunday, July 20, 2008

HELLO, IT'S ME!

Hello! It's me! (Sounds like an old Todd Rundgren song, but anyway...)

So much has happened since the last time I posted...a mere three months ago, but who's counting? Well, I am, my friends. Because since my computer went south, preventing me from blogging -- writing, really -- my zest for life has headed in the same direction.

If I didn't know better, I'd say it was a case of the vapors -- lying in bed, too tired to move, no desire to enjoy the great summer outdoors...food doesn't even thrill me anymore...

And when you're a Heise by birth, and you've lost your lust for food, well...suffice to say that the day my Dad pushed away a plate of food, it was his last -- he passed away that night...in other words, it's a cry for help, a sign that the end is definitely near...that you better do SOMETHING...and FAST!

But I digress.

At first I just blamed my malaise on mid-life menopausal monotony...then I blamed it on the dreaded Iowa hellish heat and air-you-can-wear humidity. But then it hit me...I haven't written anything for THREE months! And I am a writer! Writing is my life's blood! It is my passion! No writing, no passion, no energy.

But what to do? My computer is still in the shop, so today I am blogging from my son's friend's laptop...ahhhhh...back in the saddle again, if only for today!

So where to begin?

Well, last I blogged, of course, my son and husband scared the bejeebies out of me one night when they were late coming home from Daniel's first official driving practice after getting his learner's permit.

He has since passed driver's ed, and I have accepted the fact that he is growing up and his learning to drive is a good thing -- I would even go so far as to say he has all the makings of becoming an excellent driver like his dad -- which is a damn good thing, since I am 51 years old and still won't drive on the interstate...

Along those same lines, I couold write reams about the frustrations of being a middle-aged mom with a teen-age son and how some days I just want to throttle him just because he is what he is -- a teenager -- much the same feeling my older sister had about me when I was Daniel's age...and she was only like 22 or 23 at the time.

And yet there are those nights, when he comes home after a night working at the local pizza parlor, and he brings home a "mistake" pizza, and we sit on the porch and talk for an hour or two...and I wouldn't trade these teenage years for anything. I am just thankful he is here, with me, and safe.

Or I could go on and on about my man Obama winning the presidential primary! Woo-Hoo! My friend Sandy A. and I, on a last-minute whim, zipped to Des Moines to see him for his pre-official primary victory speech -- I was THAT close to being able to shake hands with the guy...what a moment!

Oh, there have been so many instances where I've seen something on TV or heard something in passing conversations with friends and neighbors and I've excitely thought, "That would make a GREAT blog post" only to sink into sadness when it hit me in that same moment, "But I don't have a computer, damn it!"

It's not that I think what I have to say about any partiular topic is earthshaking...it's just that I am a writer, and writer's write, writer's create...and I love the creative aspect of it all. I love taking that blank screen and making something out of nothing...something that might just strike a chord with the person reading the blog. It's a way of connecting in this big ol' crazy and oft' cold world.

Granted, I could put pen to paper or keep a hardbound journal -- Lord knows I've got a collection of half-filled dog-earred diaries from back in the day...but it's not the same. My fingers need to connect to a keyboard for the wheels to start turning upstairs -- it's just the ol' newsreporter in me...she's still in there, my inner reporter.

Bless her heart.

What would I do without her?










Not blogger's block -- I've had scads of stuff to blog about, from MY MAN OBAMA'S BIG WIN (Woo-Hoo), to

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

OMG - but, I'll leave BHO for another time. Same look same fire. Sounds like life is treating you well. I'm happy for you even if you are getting old. Stay off of 75 when in town.
-Trebor

Anonymous said...

Good lord, woman...I was really beginning to worry about you. I left you a voicemail with my new cell number...by chance, did you not hear the message, darling? At any rate, take care sweetness! Email if you get a chance...
Petunia

Anonymous said...

Try keeping a journal. Your stuff is too good to not be recorded. I think you will enjoy it once you get reacquainted with the old pen and parchment--the first 50 days are the hardest. And it will be great source material for you when you get your internet portal back. Someday you will have a best-selling book.

Anonymous said...

Say "Hello" to John. It still irritates me that he is not preaching somewhere. He has the gift in spades. The only thing he lacked was a good church secretary.

cbranden said...

...2.15.10....waiting, waiting....